I havent had a decent sleep in weeks.
Images of you flash through my head constantly,
even when in a deep slumber.
The thought of you leaving me for someone
who cares for no one, but himself twists my
stomache in a most obscure fashion.
Perhaps that is why it is so difficult for me to let go.
Why cant I just revert to being numb to all emotion
like before?
Is this a sign of weakness, frailty, and insecurity?
Yet I am none of these things.
Where is the meaning in all of thisconfusionthissuffering?
Each day I try to swallow the reality of it.
Its a bit difficult to digest most times.
Then there are those few occasions where I hysterically
laugh
at the scenario that I did not ask to be in.
Yet Im in it, regardless of whether I like it or not.
In truth, I despise and hate it completely with just as much
passion
as I love its source.
Such neurotic emotions cannot be trustedever.
You tell me how one can cope with wanting to be closer
to someone when they cannot.
Still there is very little too great to bear for someone
you truly love.
Here endeth this rambling